Schrodinger's Murderer

In one of his videos, Justicar (aka integralmath) mentioned that Schrodinger’s Rapist would be a notion that is unacceptable if we were talking about black people instead of men. I thought this was a brilliant assessment so I took on the task of editing the original post and converting some key elements of the piece for the sake of comparing it to any other subset of the human population. I changed any reference to males, men, boys, gentlemen, guys, etc., to black people. I also changed any references to females, women, girls, ladies, gals, etc., to white people. And finally, I changed rape for murder. You may also notice that some key words may have changed to keep in the spirit of the original post. Please note that any changes have not been made with the intention of changing the meaning (spirit) of the original post, but rather to allow for a logical continuance in the script. Here is the original post, in case you wish to compare just how much edition was done on the blog post.

GUEST BLOGGER STARLING: SCHRÖDINGER’S MURDERER: OR A BLACK PERSON’S GUIDE TO APPROACHING STRANGE WHITE PEOPLE WITHOUT BEING MACED

Posted on October 8, 2009 by Sweet Machine, re-edited by Spinoza’s Psyche

Black people. Thank you for reading.

Let me start out by assuring you that I understand you are a good sort of person. You are kind to children and animals. You respect the elderly. You donate to charity. You tell jokes without laughing at your own punchlines. You respect white people. You like white people. In fact, you would really like to have a mutually respectful and friendly relationship with a white person. Unfortunately, you don’t yet know that white person—he or she isn’t working with you, nor have you been introduced through mutual friends or drawn to the same activities. So you must look further afield to encounter this person.

So far, so good. Miss LonelyHearts, your humble instructor, approves. Human connection, love, friendship: there is nothing wrong with these yearnings.

Now, you want to become acquainted with a white person you see in public. The first thing you need to understand is that white people are dealing with a set of challenges and concerns that are strange to you, a black person. To begin with, we would rather not be killed or otherwise violently assaulted.

“But wait! I don’t want that, either!”

Well, no. But do you think about it all the time? Is preventing violent assault or murder part of your daily routine, rather than merely something you do when you venture into war zones? Because, for white people, it is. When I go out with black friends, I always leave the black person’s full name and contact information written next to my computer monitor. This is so the cops can find my body if I go missing. My best friend will call or e-mail me the next morning, and I must answer that call or e-mail before noon-ish, or my friend begins to worry. If my friend doesn’t hear from me by three or so, he or she will call the police. My activities after dark are curtailed. Unless I am in a densely-occupied, well-lit space, I won’t go out alone. Even then, I prefer to have a white friend or two, or my dogs, with me. Do you follow rules like these?

So when you, a stranger, approach me, I have to ask myself: Will this black man murder me?

Do you think I’m overreacting? One in every six American whites will be robbed or mugged in their lifetime. I bet you don’t think you know any murderers, but consider the sheer number of murders that must occur. These murders are not all committed by scary black men, or other members of the Brotherhood of Scary Hair and Homemade Religion. While you may assume that none of the black guys you know are murderers, I can assure you that at least one is. Consider: if every murderer commits an average of ten murders (a horrifying number, isn’t it?) then the concentration of murderers in the population is still a little over one in sixty. That means four in my graduating class in high school. One among my coworkers. One in the subway car at rush hour. Eleven who work out at my gym. How do I know that you, the nice black guy who wants nothing more than companionship and friendship, are not this murderer?

I don’t.

When you approach me in public, you are Schrödinger’s murderer. You may or may not be a black man who would commit murder. I won’t know for sure unless you start assaulting me. I can’t see inside your head, and I don’t know your intentions. If you expect me to trust you—to accept you at face value as a nice sort of black—you are not only failing to respect my reasonable caution, you are being cavalier about my personal safety.

Fortunately, you’re a good black guy. We’ve already established that. Now that you’re aware that there’s a problem, you are going to go out of your way to fix it, and to make the white people with whom you interact feel as safe as possible.

To begin with, you must accept that I set my own risk tolerance. When you approach me, I will begin to evaluate the possibility you will do me harm. That possibility is never 0%. For some whites, particularly whites who have been victims of violent assaults, any level of risk is unacceptable. Those whites do not want to be approached, no matter how nice you are or how much you’d like to befriend them. Okay? That’s their right. Don’t get pissy about it. Whites are under no obligation to hear the sales pitch before deciding they are not in the market to buy.

The second important point: you must be aware of what signals you are sending by your appearance and the environment. We are going to be paying close attention to your appearance and behavior and matching those signs to our idea of a threat.

This means that some black guys should never approach strange white people in public. Specifically, if you have truly unusual standards of personal cleanliness, if you are the prophet of your own religion, or if you have tattoos of gang symbols or Technicolor cockroaches all over your face and neck, you are just never going to get a good response approaching a white person cold. That doesn’t mean you’re doomed to a life of solitude, but I suggest you start with internet hanging, where you can put your unusual traits out there and find a white friend who will appreciate them.

Are you wearing a tee-shirt making a murder joke? NOT A GOOD CHOICE—not in general, and definitely not when approaching a strange white person.

Pay attention to the environment. Look around. Are you in a dark alley? Then probably you ought not approach a white person and try to strike up a conversation. The same applies if you are alone with a white in most public places. If the public place is a closed area (a subway car, an elevator, a bus), even a crowded one, you may not realize that the white’s ability to flee in case of threat is limited. Ask yourself, “If I were dangerous, would this white person be safe in this space with me?” If the answer is no, then it isn’t appropriate to approach this person.

On the other hand, if you are both at church accompanied by your mothers, who are lifelong best friends, the white person is as close as it comes to safe. That is to say, still not 100% safe. But the odds are pretty good.

The third point: White people are communicating all the time. Learn to understand and respect white people’s communication to you.

You want to say Hi to the nice white person on the subway. How will they react? Fortunately, I can tell you with some certainty, because he or she is already sending messages to you. Looking out the window, reading a book, working on a computer, arms folded across chest, body away from you = do not disturb. So, y’know, don’t disturb this person. Really. Even to say that you like their hair, shoes, or book. A compliment is not always a reason for white people to smile and say thank you. You are a threat, remember? You are Schrödinger’s murderer. Don’t assume that whatever you have to say will win them over with charm or flattery. Believe what the white is signaling, and back off.

If you speak, and the white person responds in a monosyllabic way without looking at you, they are saying, “I don’t want to be rude, but please leave me alone.” You don’t know why. It could be “Please leave me alone because I am trying to memorize Beowulf.” It could be “Please leave me alone because you are a scary, scary man with breath like a water buffalo.” It could be “Please leave me alone because I am planning my assassination of a major geopolitical figure and I will have to kill you if you are able to recognize me and blow my cover.”

On the other hand, if the white person is turned towards you, making eye contact, and they respond in a friendly and talkative manner when you speak to them, you are getting a green light. You can continue the conversation until you start getting signals to back off.

The fourth point: If you fail to respect what white people say, you label yourself a problem.

There’s a black man with whom I went out on a single date—afternoon coffee, for one hour by the clock—on July 25th. In the two days after the date, he sent me about fifteen e-mails, scolding me for non-responsiveness. I e-mailed him back, saying, “Look, this is a disproportionate response to a single date. You are making me uncomfortable. Do not contact me again.” It is now October 7th. Does he still e-mail?

Yeah. He does. About every two weeks.

This black man scores higher on the threat level scale than Man with the Cockroach Tattoos. (Who, after all, is guilty of nothing more than terrifying bad taste.) You see, Mr. E-mail has made it clear that he ignores what I say when he wants something from me. Now, I don’t know if he is an actual murderer, and I sincerely hope he’s not. But he is certainly Schrödinger’s murderer, and this particular Schrödinger’s murderer has a probability ratio greater than one in sixty. Because a black dude who ignores a white person’s NO in a non-sexual setting is more likely to ignore NO in a sexual setting, as well.

So if you speak to a white person who is otherwise occupied, you’re sending a subtle message. It is that your desire to interact trumps his or her right to be left alone. If you pursue a conversation when they tried to cut it off, you send a message. It is that your desire to speak trumps their right to be left alone. And each of those messages indicates that you believe your desires are a legitimate reason to override their rights.

For white people, who are watching you very closely to determine how much of a threat you are, this is an important piece of data.

The fifth and last point: Don’t murder. Nor should you commit these similar but less severe offenses: don’t assault. Don’t grope. Don’t constrain. Don’t brandish. Don’t expose yourself. Don’t threaten with physical violence. Don’t threaten with sexual violence.

Shouldn’t this go without saying? Of course it should. Sadly, that’s not the world I live in. You may be beginning to realize that it’s not the world you live in, either.

Miss LonelyHearts wishes you happiness and success in your search for white companionship.